I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
