You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
