i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
