its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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