Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
