I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
