Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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