When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
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