i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
