Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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