i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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