Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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