That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
