So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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