Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize