They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
sex in a hospital.. check
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
