it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
