Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
