Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize