Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I licked your asshole in confidence.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
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