I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
