So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Randomize
