What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
third nipple confirmed
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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