She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
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