Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
