Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize