Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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