dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
