I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize