as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Do vagina's smell?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Randomize
