do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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