Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I would fuck him just for his dog
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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