Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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