Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
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