kristin has been a bad kristin
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I am mentally ready for anal.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
