it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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