just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize