hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
my mouth tastes like poor choices
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
