i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
