Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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