I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
