I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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