I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
