so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
