When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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