Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
