Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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