today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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