Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
There's always time for handjobs
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Randomize
