THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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