I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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