I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
