I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
