1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
